Check It Out

Institutions and societies are often worlds of difference. Institutions always paint the ideal scenario, only to be disappointed by societies.

There are many theories researched by experts about many issues, such as how children should be scaffolded when they were young, what sort and what amount of nutrition one should have in a day, which fiscal policies should the government use when they wanted to turn their economy around, and so on. Institutional researchers often have the data and information to back their findings. Their research papers will be detailed and professionally presented and published into books. Very often, these institutional researchers are also some kind of a lecturer in universities. Their books will then be used as textbooks by fresh blood, (which means that the new students have to buy their books) or used by anyone who needed the information to help them make a decision.


However, have the institutional researchers realised that as their research papers are published, a whole new paradigm is being formed? The world is changing ever so rapidly that even old folks need to run if they are to survive in the society.

Institutional researchers seem to omit this “Change” factor. They are always studying backdated journals and theories, and they always use these journals and theories to substantiate their new findings. Furthermore, many researches can be easily manipulated to get the desired results. (I do not mean that all researches are rigged.)

So how are we going to ever know what is true and what is false? That is an answer that I do not know. (Seems like I only know how to complain.) I guess the truth is based on individual perceptions and experiences and how open minded one is. As for me, I will carry on reading the journals and theories, but I will not be overly awed by them. I will live with change and take things as they come along.

Night Life

Pregnant women can really change their diet. My wife now eats a lot of chili, as compared to the past. She used to love to eat Otah, but now she feels like vomiting whenever she sees it. My wife loves to drink Coke and seldom chooses F&N drinks. But yesterday night, she had been calling out, practically shouting in her dream that she wanted to drink F&N Orange. She finally woke up.

As her desire in her dream was not satisfied, she sat up and said out loud, “I want to drink F&N Orange.” Her intention of saying out loud was actually to wake me up, so that I could get her the drink. Too bad. I am like a log, when I am asleep. I was sleeping too soundly to hear the commotion she created.

She told me this morning and I simply could not believe it! My wife can even dream of drinking F&N Orange, when she does not drink it normally. How weird. Anyway, I told her if she needed anything at night, just nudge me till I wake up. (Oh my god... what have I said?) Seems like she is being influenced by our baby already!

Speed

I have always love speed, whether it is from the innocent sprinting on the field after a soccer ball, to the leisure of inline skating, to the death defying road rage. Racing on the road may not be the right thing to do, but I simply love it.

I used to ride a sports bike, not a big one though. Yamaha TZR 125, red and white, to be exact. It was my first bike and it was a typical “bad boy” kind of bike. I would fly down the street at any opportunity I could get. In fact, I always turn a full throttle.

I raced quite often, either with my friends or challenged strangers on the road. Although my bike had a small capacity, I used my guts to beat them flat. I would dart in between cars and trucks, squeezing through the narrowest of gaps at high speed to gain a lead. Traffic lights were often indicators for the beginning of the excitement. After that, it served no purpose. Whatever color it lighted, there was only one instruction to follow, and that was “Go”. Nothing could stop me, not even after I had an accident, which my parents did not know about. I did all this because I loved the adrenalin rush in my body.

I ride an even smaller bike now, Suzuki Viva 110, red and black. I do not race anymore, but I can still taste the adrenalin every time I rush to work, or in between appointments. The fantastic feeling of riding down the road in between traffics reminds me of the good old days. But as I grow older, I realize that what I used to do was an act of a foolish young lad. I still have my scars to remind me of those crazy days and they will remind me not to repeat my folly for the rest of my life.

Just Eat!

My wife wanted me to write an article about her cooking. And here it is dedicated to her. (Just a short one though.)

In general, my wife cooks well. Her specialized dish is stir fried beef. I love her stir fried beef. I don’t know how she cooks it but it tastes great!!! (Who cares, as long as I can eat it.) She uses sliced beef, ginger, special sauce, and secret marinating to produce the fragrance and taste of the stir fried beef.

She told me that her cooking used to be better when she was still schooling. But nowadays, because of work commitment, she seldom cooks. Furthermore, there is the hassle of cleaning up the dishes after meal, a task that my wife and I hate to do. We love to eat and we will eat till we are stuffed and can hardly move. And we will carry on eating still. Yes, we are gluttons!!! So after dinner, we will remain immobile for some time. After that, we will start to feel sleepy and all tasks on hand seem insignificant comparing to satisfying our sleepy eyes. We don’t have a maid. Who will then wash the dishes?

Because of our laziness and dislike for washing dishes, we often eat out. The hassle of washing dishes after dinner no longer exists. We will feast heartily till we are satisfied. We will then quickly grab a cab home and sleep.

But still, whenever, my wife is in the mood of cooking (and cleaning), it will be my honor to finish the food that she conjures up. Simply delicious!!!

Baby Rocks!

Today, my wife and I went to the gynecologist to check on our baby. We got up pretty early as our appointment was 9am. However, as a typical Singaporean, we left our house at 8.50am, reaching only at 9.20am.

At the clinic, my wife went away for a while, to go through the usual check up procedure at the clinic before waiting for her turn to see the gynecologist. I had nothing to do, so I picked up a family magazine to read. All of a sudden, I remembered that this was my wife’s fourth month of pregnancy. We could find out the gender of our baby! How exciting!

It was our turn. We stepped into the gynecologist’s office. She asked the usual questions about the health of my wife and went through some official documents with us. She told us that we would be able to find out the gender of the baby. My wife and I smiled at each other. Our facial features look different. My wife has big beautiful eyes, while I have small ones. She has a small nose, while I have a big one. Thus the baby’s features, such as eyes and nose, will be easily distinguished to be either inherited from my wife or me. (Hopefully, inherit more of my wife’s and not too much of mine.)

The gynecologist went through the ultra scan and she was able to pick up the head and limbs of the little one. She then pointed at the cheek bone of our baby. It was very obvious even when our baby was still in the womb. Then I remembered. The only feature my wife and I have that is similar is that we have high cheek bones. No wonder, our baby’s cheek bone is so obvious.

Anyway, when the scan ended, we were told that the gender of our baby could not be distinguished yet. The baby wasn’t cooperative enough to let us know the gender. The legs were like a pair of chopsticks parallel to each other. Since they were not apart, the gynecologist was unable to tell the gender.

I feel that having a baby boy or a baby girl really does not matter. As long as our baby is healthy, we are very happy.

To All The Great People

Last year, my dad bought a silk blanket for my wife and me. It costs about $800. I was very shocked. My dad had been a very thrifty man and he would spend frugally in order to support the family. He was always thinking of how to save up money for our education and future. Thus it was a total surprise when he spent that amount of money on a blanket. He told us that the blanket was made of great quality silk and that it would be able to keep us from the cold weather during December period. It was very sweet of him to show his love and affection for us. Dad never says he loves us but his actions are always catered to his children.

Recently, my mum had bought a new set of pots as a gift for my wife and me. It costs about S$2500. I had never known that it would cost so expensive to buy a set of metal pots until now. And to add on to my surprise, I did not know that my mum was willing to spend that amount of money. She wanted us to eat healthily at home, rather than eating outside so often, and thus the cost was of no concern to her.

Yesterday, my wife and I went home to have dinner with my parents. It was a sumptuous meal of pizza, double boiled chicken, mixed vegetables and egg tarts as desert. I had not had any home cooked food for some time. It was fantastic! I ate till I was bloated. After the dinner, my sisters asked my wife and me into their music studio. I wonder what was it for. Later, I found out. Research has shown that classical music has got a pacifying effect on babies. So my sisters, without hesitation, lent us their best collection to us, so that we can play it for our little baby, due to be delivered in February.

As their child and brother, I am guilty of not showing enough love to them. I have been busy with work in the past and now also. Their actions make me feel loved and I feel sorry for them for having such a heartless child and brother.

Dad, Mum, SS and SY, thanks for everything and I love you!!!

Magical Peace

Today, my friend introduced a video clip to me. (I need to get the link from my friend so that I can share the video clip with more people and let them enjoy it too.)

It was a video clip about an artist, who was from Korea, giving an art concert. The artist used sand to create his artwork on the spot.

When he had completed his first picture, he transformed the same art piece into another different picture with a touch of his finger. He would go on and on, from whales to faces to telling the story of Moses. The sand danced as if they had been turned alive by the touch of his fingers. It was fantastic, tranquilizing and very touching. It was beautiful beyond verbal description, especially, with the soft background music as accompaniment. It was simply magical.

There Is Always An Exit

Today is not a good day for my wife and me. My wife had a tongue lashing from her manager, Cal, (Cal is her immediate superior and not a very good one), while I had a bad experience with some critical project members.

Today, Cal had realized that she had to submit a report on Monday and she did not have time to complete it. She was given 3 months to complete the report and she did not even start doing it till today. So she wanted my wife, her subordinate, to do it for her.

My wife had her own on-going project to complete and there were deadlines too. She too had a meeting scheduled on Monday, in order to be on the right track. My wife had already scheduled that meeting early this month and all personnel involved were already informed. All of a sudden, Cal approached her and demanded that she drop her project to help her to complete her report. It seemed like her report was the most urgent thing in the world. My wife’s project was a critical project, allocated to her by the Plant Manager (highest position in the company). The project concerned the laying of the foundation of a new culture in the company, to strive the company to greater heights. I cannot imagine Cal said that my wife’s project was unimportant. What kind of a manager would place her own report before the company’s direction? Anyway, when my wife refused to do it for her, she gave my wife a tongue lashing about planning and placing priorities and she walked off. Ha! Look who’s talking about planning and placing priorities!

As for me, I had a project meeting today. The group was brainstorming about ideas concerning the project. There was this inexperienced young punk, blonde, throwing all sorts of criticism at all the ideas. When he was asked to give a suggestion, he got dumb struck. Then he started to talk nonsense loudly, disturbing the discussion. My blood boils as I am typing this.

Anyway, I just watched a TV program. I cannot remember the name of the show. It was about an artist, Alison, who had no hand. She was preparing to bring up her baby as she was due to give birth. Imagine, no hand, and have to single handedly bring up the baby. (Her husband left her.) Guess her problem is much bigger than my wife’s and mine. After watching, we got over our issues.

Just A Drop

Just reached home at 8pm and found my wife sleeping already. So early I thought. Not wanting to disturb her sleep, I went to take a bath quietly. It must have been a hard day for her at work. When I went to the dining table after my bath, I saw a little note that shaped like a drop of water.


The header of the note reads, “A DROP FOR YOUR BUCKET.” I read the contents. It was about me looking after her younger brother, who is 7 years old. She thanked me for my patience. I felt great!!!

I thought it was very sweet of her to show her appreciation. Not that I wanted appreciation for everything I do, but I found that we took things for granted very often. Nowadays, we seldom thank anyone anymore. Probably, we are moving too fast to appreciate the details that make up LIFE.

How often do we thank our parents, when they cook up a sumptuous dinner for us, when we visit them? How often do we thank our friends who give us a lift to work everyday, when they can simply give an excuse not to? How often do we thank our spouses for their understanding when we are in the most difficult times of our lives, when they can just walk out on us? Just a simple “thank you” will brighten their day.

I am guilty of the above. And I just put a drop into my wife’s bucket.

Art My Life

I had just attended an art lesson today. It was about Collagraph, a kind of print making. Print making are things that uses ink, stencil and maybe a presser. Examples of print are the newspaper print that we read and the date inking stamp that we use.

Collagraph is a kind of print technique that combines collages and print to form a picture of many textures. I never knew there was this kind of print. I also never knew print making had such a long history, more than 800 years ago.

Our art teacher, Mr Foo Kwee Horng, is very experienced. He showed us the various kinds of print and also the history of print making. It was an interesting lesson. He told us that he loved art a lot and went to be a full time artist. Unfortunately, he did not do well as he only sold an art piece for $300 in one year. In order to earn a living, he had to give up as a full time artist and be an art teacher instead. It seems like not many people in the society appreciates art pieces. (Probably until the artist die, only do their works become famous.)

I admire his courage to step out into the society to realize his ambition. I love art too. However, my knowledge is little, so is my imagination and skill. I have always envied people who can sell their art pieces. More importantly, the buyer shows appreciation of the artists’ works. Sometimes, it is not about the money. It is a fantastic feeling when someone loves your work, the sense of satisfaction that you are recognized for what you do passionately. It will be heavenly, if I can sell, or even to give away an art piece, to a person who truly appreciates my work. It will be great!!!

Back To Basics

Today, my cousin, 19 years old, returned my skates, which she borrowed on last Friday. She fell down a few times and got some bruises. She decided not to learn skating. She said that inline skating was boring. I would say that inline skating is a leisure activity for me. It will not be the end of the world if I do not know how to skate.

I remember that in the year 1999, I started to learn skating. My wife, girlfriend then, was my coach. Ha! How useless of me. We were dating and we went skating one day. My cool side was “uncooled” when I landed on my bum. We had a good laugh. After that, I went on to add collections of scars to my already much scarred body. I am able to skate now effortlessly, all thanks to my wife. In fact, I am able to do some stunts. (Better than her now!)

I see learning to skate as the same process as a baby learning to walk. Throw all egos aside and you learn the simple but hard way. SIMPLY HAVE TO DO IT!!! Try, fall, try, fall, try… and finally succeed. I guess it may be the same for everything else in life.

Who's Turn?

Love is complex. Love is a chemical reaction in our body that usually lasts for only about 2 years, very scientifically put. But in my mini Oxford Dictionary definition, love is a kind of wonderful feeling, fondness, warm affection, if it is truly found. But sometimes I wonder if a compromise is alright.

My friend, Jack, told me that he likes a friend of mine, Alice. Alice has a boyfriend already. However, the relationship is not stable. Should Jack go after Alice?

I thought the answer is obviously yes. I thought that if Alice's relationship with the boyfriend is strong, the relationship will not be affected by the intrusion of Jack. But if Alice's romantic relationship is weak, the relationship will end even without the appearance of Jack. Then, I guess it should be alright that Jack goes ahead and makes his move. But why wouldn't he approach her, when I am willing to help? (Note: Jack and Alice do not know each other.) Many reasons were given and one of them is “I do not want to be a third party.”

One of my friends, SK had similar experience, several years back. He approached the girl then, and found out that she had a boyfriend. However, he was not deterred by the fact. SK believed that she was his true love. Now, they are happily married. I felt that SK did the right thing in going after his love, facing up to his true feelings. (Wondered what will happen to SK if he didn’t make his move. Probably, he would have to settle for a compromised partner? Very unfair to both parties, I feel.)

Recently, another friend of mine, West, got to know a guy named, Jay (Obviously Jay is a guy and West is a girl.) She is interested in Jay but Jay has got no idea. (She did not have many chances to talk to Jay.) Coincidentally, both West and I know Jay. She told me to find out more information about Jay’s relationship status as it was not convenient for a girl to do so. She did not want to scare him off. Seems like she has a strategy!!! NOW LOOK HERE!!! Even girls are making their moves nowadays. They are proactive in searching for their love. What are the guys doing? A reversal of positions?

I believe that West will succeed in finding her true love, while Jack, I wish him all the best. And I wish everyone in the position similar to Jack, GOOD LUCK!!!

Loss of spirit and sleep

Just watched Chelsea vs Arsenal at Stamford Bridge. Score is 1-0 to Chelsea. Goal scored by Drogba.

I felt that Henry is getting too much responsibility as a captain and he is trying to do too much!!! He also does not have a very good work rate unlike Hleb!!! Get someone else, such as Gilberto, to be captain, and off load Henry’s responsibility then he will be able to perform again. His style of play is so predictable now. He lacks imagination!!! Really, only miracles or fools will allow him to score again.

I am very angry with the team as a whole. What happened to the usual enthusiastic and hardworking play, whereby Arsenal closes down opponents quickly and attacks swiftly? What is happening to Arsenal??? UGH!!!!!! I am so frustrated!!! Please wake up, Arsenal!!!

Tomorrow I have to wake up early! My support for Arsenal, and their loss, has dampened my spirits to work tomorrow. Hope I’m not late.

It's a dog's life

Today, I went to Crystal Jade at Takashimaya for lunch. It was a lunch session with my in-laws. Obviously my wife went with me.

We were supposed to meet her parents at 11.30am. But we arrived earlier at 11.20am, very hungry. We ordered some Tim Sum before we were starved to death. Then my sister-in-law arrived. She ordered some more food. We were happily chatting away. Then my father-in-law came. We told him to order too and he did.

The whole lunch session was good until we couldn’t finish the food. My wife’s dad suddenly flared up and threw tantrum. I have got no idea if it was necessary. He started to scold my sister-in-law for poor selection of food and wastage of food. He even vented his anger on the waitress. He insisted to cancel the order even though the order was on its way out. The poor waitress didn’t know what to do. Anyway, she had no power to make decisions. The decision making would fall on the shoulders of the Captain. After that, he preached Christianity. (No offence to Christians intended.)

I felt the whole issue could be omitted. Although my father-in-law had good intentions about the amount of food ordered, he could have considered the position of his daughter that she was being filial to ask him to order his favorite food. (There may not be any favorite food, as my dad-in-law was getting health conscious. He is reducing the intake of fatty and oily food.) Anyway, he should be more tactful in his remark, I felt.

I understood that he was having a hard time in his business during this period, The Hungry Ghost Festival. However, he should not act as if he was the only one with problems and vented anger on others, especially at the expense of hurting other’s feelings. I felt that it was pretty mean of him.

Fortunately, the issue was resolved by asking the waitress to pack the balance of the food. We had some food packed and taken away in the end. The solution, in the end, was so simple. No need to flare up. Without anger overwhelming the logic of thought, problems can be solved easily. I believe that my dad-in-law would regret what he did when he reflected his actions today. However, we do not expect an apology from him. I believe he may want to retain a little bit of his ego as a dad and as children (and son-in-law) of his, we understand that.

Happy Birthday Dinner

Today evening, we celebrated my wife's birthday with my family. We had dinner at Peach Garden Restaurant at Thomson Plaza. Fortunately, my sister booked a table for us. The queue was ridiculously long and the place was packed. Wonder what was it that makes this place popular?

We sat down and browsed through the menu. Finally, we decided to have a set menu. (Nothing surprising. We always order set menu whenever we go to restaurants.) We placed our order and waited as more and more people fill up the empty seats.

Our first dish arrived. Without much ado, we started our gluttony. I guessed everyone was hungry. It was already 8.45pm!

There was Shark’s Fin Soup. My dad added mustard in to the soup. Yucks! But he argued that this is the way that Cantonese eats and that I did not know how to enjoy. I verified the statement with my mum. She replied that ever since she went dating with my dad, he had been eating Shark’s Fin Soup with mustard, just that nowadays, restaurants seldom provide mustard that my dad had changed his taste to accommodate the common vinegar and salt. I tried a spoon full from his bowl. Quite a unique taste and quite tangy. I added mustard to mine too, rather than the usual vinegar and salt. Finished everything and I had a headache. Too much mustard.

We finished our meal at 10.15pm. It was a seven course dinner and it was great! I will go back to that place but not in the near future. I felt a bit heavy after the meal.


Anyway, we went back to our place to cut the birthday cake. My wife had always told me that she wanted to have a birthday cake to cut and someone to sing birthday song to her. I guess this really made my wife happy. She was grinning all the way, especially when we were singing the birthday song. I think she felt giggly. She made her wish and blew out the candles and we had a wonderful time munching the Chocolate Etoile Cake from Sweet Secrets.

My wife really enjoyed the dinner and the cake I bought and I am really happy for her!

Happy Birthday, My Love!!!

Today is my wife's birthday! I gave her an art piece that I did, trying to lead her thinking that it was her present. She indeed looked disappointed. Ha! She even said the art piece was quite disturbing. Nevertheless, she said, "Thank you." I have succeeded in creating the initial disappointment for a setup to a later surprise. But quite sad to hear that my art piece isn't that great.

Anyway, the real present that I wanted to give her was a bag bought from Project Shop. I bought with the intention of matching her pregnant power office suit. When I presented the bag to her, she looked not pleasantly happy too. Gosh!!! I asked if she liked it and I guess out of courtesy, she said that she did. I spent quite an amount on the bag! Oh no! What can I do to make her happy today? (Not that I don't make her happy daily.) What was initially setup as a surprise for her turns out to be a surprise for me!!! (She didn't really liked it, not as I thought she would!)

Finally, and fortunately, I showed her a receipt to her birthday cake. She glowed! Phew!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DARLING!!!

The Unfinished Work

I find that workload is piling day by day. It does not seem to go away no matter how you clear them. Somehow, they will find their way onto your desk and stick firm to their position. And very soon, with all the deadlines approaching, you feel the heat.

In fact, it is a snowballing effect. The more work and deadlines you have, the more stressful you become. When you have more stress, you work longer hours hoping to clear your work. When you work longer hours, you have less sleep. When you have less sleep, your health is affected. You feel a little bit sick but you do not want to see a doctor because you have so many deadlines to meet. When your health is affected, you cannot perform in your job. And when you cannot perform in your job, your work piles up. When your work piles up, with all the deadlines, you have more stress than before. And the cycle continues until you are down and out with your health. You collapse right in front of your boss. When you wake up, you are lying on the bed physically very sick but mentally, you are still at your workplace. Your love ones are very worried. They visit you everyday. When you are discharged, they take great care of you.

Two weeks have passed and you have finally recovered. You are happy to step back into your workplace, recharged and ready to go. You realized that the workload is same as before but this time round you have a helper. “Why are you sitting at my place?” Reality sinks in. You are history in the company. The company simply cannot cope with any job unfinished and they needed someone to clear them quick. You receive a package and off you go.

“Good luck to your future endeavors!” said your boss, accompanied with some consolation. How hypocritical is the world becoming?

Who takes pity on the poor soul that slogs his life for the benefit of the company, only to know that after falling ill due to all the workload, the poor soul was asked to go?

I have always thought that health is the number one priority compared to work. No one can ever finish their work. But “Good Health” can be exhausted!

This is what happened to my friend.

So if I have a medical certificate today, I WILL USE IT!!! I will not jeopardize my health for some stupid company and let my love ones worry!!! In fact I am doing justice to both my love ones and the company by taking MC when I am ill. So that I recover quickly to work and not spread any germs to my colleagues!

Charlie and the Coconut Tree

Yesterday night, my wife and I wanted to have dinner at our favourite "LOR MEE" stall. We went out with our hungry stomach only to discover that it has closed down. Don't know if it is closed for good or just for renovation as there is no notice. For a moment, we felt lost. What if it is not going to reopen? What if they have decided to call it quits? It is the best "LOR MEE" we have ever eaten!!! Utterly disappointed, we went to try a new stall. Can't remember what was the name of the stall but it sells "BAK CHOR MEE" at the Ang Mo Kio Central Market. Tasted not bad. Anyway, still feel a little bit down.

In the end, rather than going straight home and brood over the loss, we went to catch a movie. Charlie and The Chocolate Factory is a great story. Not that I have read it. I have heard it from my wife. Since it is showing in town, we decided to watch it.

It is about a poor little boy and his wish to visit the chocolate factory. In a contest, he won a huge prize, that is to inherit the chocolate factory. However, in order to accept the prize, he had to leave his family and never to keep in touch with them. He rejected the prize. Very noble for a young child. Eventually the story had a happy ending. To my surprise, thinking it may be a childish show at first, I found it very touching.

The events that happened yesterday night seems to relay to me a message about treasuring the things I have always taken granted for. I have taken granted that the "LOR MEE" stall will be at the hawker centre forever, I have taken granted that my love ones will be here forever, I have taken granted that I will be in good shape forever... and so many more. I have always failed to treasure what I have until I lose them, such as the "LOR MEE" stall and my 6 pecs stomach muscles. And very often it is too late. Wake Up!!! Time to take action!!!

Information Technology Is Here To Stay

Everything involves a little bit of technology nowadays. It ranges from the use of a simple calculator to the intranets of a complex network of computers to the sharing of information across the WWW. Are we able to say no to Information Technology? If we cannot, should we start teaching our children from an early age? We should advocate them to learn how to use the PC and serve the internet rather than focusing time on useless beginner level subjects such as Science, when after knowing how to serve the internet, Science can be more easily explored and learned. (Please take note that Science is a vast subject and that nobody will be able to know everything in the world.)

In fact, is there a need for the children to learn Science at a young age? What good does knowing the fact that an egg needs about 21 days to hatch to become a chick, do to the child in terms of earning a living in the future? (Does that mean that knowing the fact, the child will be very interested and become a zoologist or something?) Wouldn’t it be more applicable by teaching the kid how to serve the internet for information? Then the kid can serve the net to find out whatever he or she is interested in.

I strongly encourage that a young child should know how to serve the internet as soon as they know how to switch on and off the computer properly. With the wide exposure of the internet, be it good or bad, the child will be able to learn at a faster pace and hence fend for him or herself.

Buts and Butts

“I should do this but…” “I know but…” “I wanted to but…” “But” is a common word we tend to use nowadays. Why is it so?

Is it because we often conveniently find excuses for the things and issues we perceived as "unachievable" or "difficult", and hence we give up without even trying? We often use “BUT” to substantiate our current position. We tend to have a lot of inertia. We do not accept positive changes easily as we grow older.

What happened to our brave and daring youth? We used to be young and daring when we tried our first step. Is it true that if we know falling hurts, we will not even stand up? Although everyone is born winners, how many people carry on in their pursuit to be winners consistently? Winning does not mean putting others down. It merely means trying my best and be true to myself regardless of the results. TO HAVE NO REGRETS!

I am definitely guilty of saying the “but” word. I will change and not say it as often as I have been saying. I am able to do it and I will succeed. This is my goal and I want to feel like a winner again.

(With due respect to the word “but”, I was just making a case that I am giving myself plenty of excuses nowadays and I am changing for the better.)

Piles and Workload

I have many assignments on hand and all the deadlines are around September period, which means it’s about less than a month’s time. Gosh, am I worried. I have only started on one, which means I have about 6 more to begin to do.

It is quite yucky when everyone wants you to complete your research previously completed in 12 weeks to the current 6 weeks time frame. Expect the least unexpected. A VISIT TO THE PSYCHO CLINIC!!! No wonder this warning was issued when the assignments were given.

Singapore is churning university graduates out to the society as if it is a major “University Graduates” production factory with the labels “NUS”, “NTU” and “SMU”. If they do not have enough local supplies, they can always go overseas to attract the unpolished gems. The faster they can produce these university graduates, the more GNP the country hopes to achieve. If not, “send” overseas and get income tax anyway.

Many things in Singapore are commercialized, for example in the education system. I wonder how many teachers actually care for their students. I mean by going all out and teach them even if it means giving them one to one tuition classes at home on a Sunday afternoon. Come on, they are employees after all. How many of them are equipped with the knowledge and actually use them? Or are the schools that produce teachers trying to go through the motion and release as many “products” as possible, thinking that even if it is a defect, it will never be discovered anyway. Schools are comparing students’ results hoping to beat the other schools hands down. Thus able to attract as many students as possible because, students equal revenue. The schools are now operating like a business. Unfortunately, the customers, the students, most often are forced to purchase the products, such as Geography, History, Physics, Chemistry, Math, etc. by their parents and teachers. And how many of such subjects will be used later in life? I have studied Chemistry in my secondary school days and I have not seemed to be able to put a use to it ever since graduation.

Is there something wrong? For example, nowadays, graduates do customer service, either front desk (face to face) or via telephone. I am not putting down the job of a customer service. We need them. I just wonder which part of the university education is being used when they are handling enquiries and complains. What good is it to have a degree when you do not make use of it? (I wonder if knowing the Factor Theorem will help to explain about the insurance claims that the client wants to know.) Anyway, who cares about using the degree as long as I get a higher pay when I have that piece of paper. Probably, that is considered as a form of utilizing the qualification. Aha! Got it!!!

Whatever... Think positive! What I have written above is just to release my stress. I still love Singapore for its stability and because of all these university graduates, Singapore is having a booming economy. Cheers!!!

Sunday Soccer Day

Just installed SCV to watch soccer and HBO, compliments from my wife. Arsenal just won Newcastle 2 – 0. Scorers were Thierry Henry and Van Persie. It was quite an exciting game. I was constantly hoping that Arsenal will have the breakthrough. Unfortunately, I do not see any break through in their attack until the 81st minute penalty. Gosh, what a relief. Henry was getting predictable but he still have a lot of talent in him. Anyway, I believe that as the season goes on, Arsenal will be right back on top sitting on Chelsea, Man U and the rest. I don’t mind Liverpool getting second. I like Gerard’s attitude.

Probably due to the past few days watching Goal TV 1 and 2, I had a fantastic soccer game today morning. Played on a small pitch. Scored a hatrick. One of the goals was a volley. Quite on form today. There was this uncle Lim. He is very skillful. Had a lot of service from him that was why I could score 3 goals. Actually I missed many others. Created one for Yin. In fact, I like that creation more than the goals. Tired after that. Still trying to recover.

Hope to recover before tomorrow

Happy Birthday, Carol

Today is my sister in law's birthday. Happy Birthday Carol!

Serene and I didn't really know what to get for her because we thought she would have everything she wanted. But I guess it's the thought that counts. (Lame excuse.)

Anyway, our brains are still cracking, hoping to get something that she will really like.

Something off track. We went to see Belinda and Simon's baby boy and the name given to him is Christian. He weighs 3.5kg, one of the largest baby in the hospital. Everyone is happy and healthy. Good news!!!

I hope to go with no regrets

Yesterday, before I slept, I had this odd feeling about lying on my death bed.

I fell down recently hurting my right elbow from a rough soccer tackle. It was a pretty bad abrasion against sand and rocks. (Quite a patchy field.) It hurts a lot especially after bath. Had to be careful in taking care of the wound so that it does not become infectious. Anyway, I put on my dressing and went to bed.

As I was lying on my bed, I was pretty cautious about not causing more pain to myself. So I lay very straight and still with my right injured arm placed by my side and my left arm across my tummy. Somehow, I just wasn’t able to sleep. I realized that I was staring blankly at the ceiling. Weird thoughts started to fill my head. I started to imagine the feeling of lying on my death bed with all the various tubes plugged in to my system. Feels immobile and helpless suddenly. “Is this how I will feel like when I am going to die?” I thought to myself. “But I have got so many unfinished ambitions to fulfill.” “If I die now, will I go with regrets?” “Will I be able to let go of those unfinished businesses?” Death seems to want to let me know that I should not take my good health for granted and I should quickly finish those tasks which I deemed important before it is too late. I thought and thought and I fell asleep.

I have never thought about dying so young. Quite scary. So many things uncompleted. So many things to worry about. (But these are caused by unfinished businesses.) I have to buck up and move faster. As long as I try my best, and really my best, I hope to go with no regrets.

Procrastination and Me

I have just started on reading a book given to me by my lovely wife. The title is "On Time On Target Manager". Seems to me like a hint of dissatisfaction about me from my wife.

Anyhow, when I turned the page, there was this little note to me from her. A line caught my eye "... my husband who always want to improve..." On that note, my spirit went up. I do not deny that I love compliments. And so I embarked on the journey of conquering this little book.

The first thing that I learned was that this book was not meant for the reader. It was meant for the reader's peers who were procrastinating. Really, I though it was a good beat around the bush. Sorry, I do not mean to sound skeptical, because I really am not.

Anyway, after just reading for about 5 mins, I realised that this is a very good and easy book to read. I don't usually say a book is good and easy to read, because I hate to read. I am more of an audio person, which means that I prefer to listen to learn.

There were 3 Ps that was mentioned in the book. The first P was "Priority" and it changes from time to time. There were some good examples such as "what we have to do but we do not want to" (I hate to brush my teeth every night, because I'm too tired, but I have to. For hygiene purposes.)

Or "what we want to do but do not have to" (I do not have to blog, but I want to. Because this is what I love to do!!!) Anyhow, after completing the first P, I realised that my life has been revolved around prioritising what I love to do, rather than what I have to do. Seems like I am starting to unravel something about my life. Got to do something about it.

Guess I have to read on to find out more about the other 2 Ps.

A creation by 2 lovely people

Today is 12 of August 2005. It is a very special day. My good friends, Belinda and Simon, have just received their baby boy in Mount Alvernia Hospital. Although I have yet to see the baby's parents, I am sure they are having a wonderful time cuddling the newborn. CONGRATULATIONS TO BOTH OF YOU!!!

Looking in retrospect, she had challenged me to have my own baby before she would have hers. Hmm. Childish then. Seems like Simon is more productive than I am. "Go Simon, Go!!!" Anyway, it is good that she has her kid first. My baby will be arriving in six months time. By then, they will be experienced enough to give me some good advise on baby handling. In fact, I will seek their opinion on the services provided by Mount Alvernia Hospital.

I have heard that Mount Alvernia Hospital provides great services for delivering mums. My wife and I have intended to let our baby be delivered in this hospital too. Hope I don't hear any negative comments from them.

Pick out the cream and leave the crumps

I am very happy today. I just had a good dinner with my wife at EVA's, a peranakan restaurant. The food was ok, but it was the company that really matters.

We shared our views on various issues. One of which was to learn to pick out the positives, even when we are drowned in a bad position.

I was complaining to her about the company that I mixed with recently. They were people that were very close minded. They do not believe in self help books AT ALL (though I agree that NOT ALL self help books are great). I told them that I used some of the books and that they were pretty good. These people laughed at me. (I am not sure if they are indicating that I am helpless.) I was pretty upset although I did not show it.

My wife suggested to me to learn to handle these kind of people. Maybe I can pick out some new tips on handling difficult people. On a negative note, maybe I should share less information with them and not waste my effort, instead concentrate my effort on more productive events. Yet again, (on a positive note) they may have some good virtues that I had overlooked, such as faithfulness to their beliefs.

Anyhow, my wife told me a quote from someone "I would rather have intelligent enemies than foolish friends". I liked it but thought it was quite arrogant.

I came up with my own version "Pick out the cream and leave the crumps."

The Beginning

I love fantasies. All sorts of fantasies. Ranges from innocent ones to not so innocent ones.

Life itself is a fantasy. And I am living in one.